Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize