My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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