i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
