No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
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