dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize
