i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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