Someone shit on the floor
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize