"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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