i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
