she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
