I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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