In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Randomize
