Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
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