is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
So many bounce houses so little time
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
