just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
