I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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