too bad you live with your parents still
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
