That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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