So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
