Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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