i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
