I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Randomize
