you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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