either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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