I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
