This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
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