Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Who died my cat blue again?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
