it hurts more in the daytime
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
