opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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