i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
