I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I take back everything I said about communal showers
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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