You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
