On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Randomize
