Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Two words: blizzard sex
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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