There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize