we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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