That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Randomize
