Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
