so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
