what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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