Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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