Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
