the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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