kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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