He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I want her autograph on my taint
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
