brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
She's JV to your varsity
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I didn't notice because vodka
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize