On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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