I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
