Just cropdusted the office
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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