I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize